Seeing Red
"We're only as sick as our secrets."
— folk wisdom
October 2023 wasn't a good month. I'd like to write it off, but instead I decided to write it up, and make an assessment of myself using the values of commitment, focus, openness, respect, and courage. Many of you will know these as 'the Scrum values'. I rarely write about Scrum in this newsletter, as there are several readers from far outside the space,1 but I think we are all familiar with these values, in one way or another.
When I first learned them, I didn't pay much attention. They seemed trite, and obvious, not needing much attention. But over time I have become very fond of these five values; I have written about them,2 and even co-created an online learning module to encourage their application.3 Oddly, I always struggled to memorise these five values, and would frequently forget one or another. There is no useful acronym from the initial letters...or so I thought. Then about a year ago a colleague introduced me to the acronym FORCE: Focus, Openness, Respect, Commitment and Extreme Courage. It made total sense to me. The courage we were asking for, from those at the bottom of the corporate hierarchy, to speak truth to power was no ordinary courage. It required a giant step outside of one's comfort zone. And now, of course, I get to say to my students, May the Scrum Values be with you!
Some months later, playing with this idea, and recognising that living up to these values meant being aware of the inevitable pull away from them, I identified the five anti-values, which conveniently manifest as the DHARC side: Distraction, Hiding, Antagonism, Renegation and Comfort. It helps to visualise these in pairs:
The FORCE/The DHARC Side
Focus/Distraction
Openness/Hiding
Respect/Antagonism
Commitment/Renegation
Extreme Courage/Comfort
It also helps to set some sort of numeric scale. I'll use 5/4/3/2/1 where 5 is fully with the FORCE and 1 is a definite collapse into the DHARC side.
In any given moment, or in any given situation, or even over days, weeks or months, I can ask: which extreme am I gravitating towards? This is a powerful question to engage in, and that is what I offer here, for my personal October.
Focus/Distraction
I'd score this around a 3. I am a somewhat distracted person at the best of times, off in a world of my own, as my loved ones tell me, so probably never a 5. This month was a little worse than usual perhaps, due to travel, lack of sleep and general malaise.
Openness/Hiding
This is a 1. I didn't realise it until two days ago but I have been hiding my feelings of discontentedness and overwhelm, bottling it up in martyr-like fashion until it all came to a head. Seeing red. I like to think of myself as an open, sharing person, comfortable talking about my feelings. I am mostly that, but far from exclusively so. I turn inward, dismiss disgruntlement, tell myself I don't matter that much anyway, and reckon I just have to get on with it. One day I might learn this is a lousy strategy for a decent life.
Respect/Antagonism
Around a 2. It is obviously disrespectful not to trust my nearest and dearest with the feelings of my heart. It's an implicit put-down, essentially giving the message I don't trust you to support me. I was also explicitly rude to my wife, saying mean things I regret, and too often I was impatient with my children. I can do better.
Commitment/Renegation
Work-wise I met all my commitments, also in supporting my family in a material way. Emotionally though, I rather checked out. Made a promise I went back on, and didn't always follow through on agreements. There is always an excuse, but truly I enjoy life better when I follow through. I'll score this as a 3.
Extreme Courage/Comfort
Work-wise, I tend to stay on the right side of the courage/comfort divide, speaking out as I need to, being unafraid of consequence, not trying to make people like me. I may sometimes do it more rudely than I need to, but I rarely balk. Personally, I was afraid of sharing myself, openly, so that would be me trying to stay in my comfort zone, stay quiet, and hope my discontent would pass. That is not courageous. Still, I'll give this one a 4. Not perfect, but above average.
So there you have it, my personal October measured against the Scrum values. Happily, earlier this week I met with a human givens colleague who took me through an emotional needs audit and I was able to identify the areas I need to focus on to steer me back onto a path of righteousness.4 November looks promising.
2 But I do sometimes, for example The Gates of Hell, December 2022
2 Living the Scrum Values, 2021
3 Continuous Improvement through the Scrum Values, 2022
4 Emotional Needs Audit (ENA)
—
October News
I travelled to Amsterdam for Scrum Beyond, and the Scrum Gathering, meeting with many old friends and colleagues, and making a few new ones. I taught two in-person Scrum classes in London, unusual in post-covid times, but very enjoyable. Asrai and I had a few days in Harrogate, lazing around, swimming, eating and being rather hotel-bound due to the rain. Creatively, and physically I balked. Maybe the rain dampened my spirits but I did the barest minimum of all the things I enjoy, finding excuses to stay home avoiding exercise, and catching up on admin stuff (somewhat justified) instead of writing and drawing. This of course all contributed to my low October mood. A shame really, as this is usually my favorite month, with the trees turning to gold, orange, yellow and red, leaves falling and colouring the sidewalks, tree skeletons emerging, and the air turning cool enough for scarves and gloves. I'm making a point now of having extra appreciation for November. The nights draw in, the air is filled with gunpowder and smoke, leaves turn to mush underfoot, nature decays, and everything is damp. And yet...
"Peering from some high window, at the gold of November sunset and feeling that if day has to become night, this is a beautiful way." — E. E. Cummings
Happy thanksgiving to my USA friends, and see you all in December,
Tobias
If you'd like to receive my monthly newsletter by email click here to subscribe.
October Projects
- Scrum u ime ljudi The People's Scrum, Serbian translation, released 24th October 2023.
- The Labyrinth of Corporate Facilitation: Power, Compassion, and Change A three-way facilitation conversation with Gabor Bittera and Breeze Dong, hosted by Myriam Hadnes for the workshops.work series.
- The illustrated KJV 365. October includes the four gospels, Matthew, Mark, Luke and John, and the book of Acts. The October illustrations are all my own work.
Upcoming events
- 16th November: Deconstructing Agile a physical, interactive, in-person workshop in London. Highly recommended for those disillusioned by the corporate capture of the Agile movement, and with a desire to regenerate its anarchic essence.
- 17th November: The Scrum Exchange an all-day, in-person event in London. Join us for another gathering of humans and ideas.
- 4 January & 7 February: The Collaborative Scrum Team a one-day online workshop, offered in two different time zones to accommodate people in different parts of the world.
- In-person CSM workshops are happening again, approximately every other month in London. The next one is 10-11 January. Please spread the word. Online CSMs also continue, for those far from the UK shores.
- My Advanced CSM program is now offered at no cost to those who choose to participate as scrum masters on my online CSM classes, and, of course, do all the requisite work to qualify at advanced level. You can join this program at any time, and work at your own pace.
- And finally, please check out The London Scrum Academy, my recently created home for all things scrum: workshops, certifications, people, articles, videos, books, and more to come...
3rd November 2023, 3.00 pm Reply to this newsletter